The understanding of conflict is based on the assumption that the basic situation has developed because different behavior patterns of persons participating in a conflict are not understood or misunderstood. In case of a conflict, the persons involved assume that the person opposite intends to attack them. This is why the conflict process is perceived as exciting.
This personal attack is usually not intended at all. There are normally so very different behavior patterns available and so very different perceptions that the parties involved in the conflict cannot put themselves in the place of the other ones and cannot imagine either that the conflict opponent probably has another behavior pattern than just his / her own one. If these different behavior patterns are additionally accompanied by a resonance, there is nothing left to stop a dispute any more. ”Resonance